5 things you should do to give in to fascism

Having ruined several expensive consumer electronics by imbibing a beverage while reading Christopher Elliot’s well-intentioned, but ill-considered list of five things you should never say to a TSA screener, I now present to you the five things you should do to just give the hell up already and accept your blue-shirted overlords.

Oh, sorry. It’s already in Mr. Elliot’s article. Well, that certainly saved me a lot of typing late on a Sunday.

Judging by the poll at the end, the same one he cites in his tweet linking to the post, between 80% and 87% of America just does as they’re told because they don’t want any trouble. Only 20% believe the Constitution still applies to the blueshirts.

C’mon, people. Is that the best we can do? Why not just round up the 20% and shoot them right now for the traitors to the new regime that they really are? How dare they threaten your safety with their blatherings about that constitution thingy you once heard about in 3rd grade. You gotta get on that plane now!

Switching out of cynical mode, this is a problem of EPIC proportions.

Can you imagine saying it’s okay for the police to regularly search their vehicles at roadblocks on your way to work? After all, they’re just doing their jobs and, well, you’re in a hurry.

“Hey, I don’t wanna be late for work, so, yeah, that bomb you planted in my trunk…it’s totally mine. I’ll drop by for the jail time and fine on my lunch break. Do you take American Express?”

Can you imagine de-boarding your train downtown and being commanded to submit to an invasive search or you won’t be allowed to leave the station? That’s right. It’s already happened.

Stand up and be counted, people. Take the poll, then put it in writing in the comments below.